When is a pound not a pound?

Remember when we could go to the grocery store to buy a half gallon of ice cream or a pound of coffee?  Have you read a recipe that calls for a 15 ounce can of whatever only to find that now the can contains something like 12.4 ounces instead?  How will that affect my recipe?  Do I have to buy two cans and figure out how much of the second can to use?  I purchased a large jug of water recently and noticed that instead of a gallon it was 3 liters.  Is that a way of letting me know that a gallon is no longer a gallon?  Oh, and have you tried to buy a one pound bag of M&Ms lately?  OK, I’ll admit that I noticed quite a while ago that I haven’t been able to do that.  What gives?  Are we being ripped off?

I’ve seen many news stories about this topic – the shrinking of packaging so manufacturers don’t have to raise prices.  Huh?  Aren’t they raising prices just by shrinking packages?  I’m paying a lot more for my M&Ms now than when I shelled out the same amount of cash and got an extra handful.  (And yes, I do miss that extra handful!)  I now buy my coffee by the pound – yes, the pound – directly at Dunkin Donuts.  I want the 16 ounce bag, not the 12 ounce bag from the grocery store. 

As far as I know, a gallon of gasoline is still a gallon.  Hmm, look what has happened to the price of gas lately.  (OK, as I write this the price has dropped a few cents per gallon.)  But here is another pet peeve – a really big one!  Why is it that when the price goes up it goes way up and then when there is a reprieve we read that we won’t see the effects for months?  I have a hard time believing that my local gas station gets a delivery overnight and another one in the middle of the day.  I recently drove past the station one evening and noticed the price had gone up.  It was even higher when I went by on my commute the next morning so I thought that I would fill up on the way home to avoid another increase over night.  Wrong!  It went up again during the day.  How could that possibly be?  Just because the price of a barrel of oil went up during the day?  Certainly that barrel hadn’t reached my station yet.  Then the price of a barrel plummets and I read that it will take time for the prices to adjust.  Huh?  Makes no sense to me.

Oh, and that brings me to another thing.  Why is it that on one stretch of a road about a mile long the price of gas varies by as much as 19 cents?  Really – I want to know.  And they say there is no price gouging?  Am I really supposed to believe that?

So, now one of the grocery stores is offering a discount on gas based on the amount of money you spend at the grocery store.  You can save 10 cents per gallon for every 100 dollars you spend.  You can accumulate savings that expire after 30 days.  (I’m not sure the details matter here.)  Anyway, my point is that I can overpay for groceries by buying smaller packages then go to the gas station and save on gas.  I’m wondering how much sense this makes.  I suppose it makes a lot of sense since I have to eat no matter what size the package of food might be.  I have to buy gasoline because my car won’t run without it.  I suppose I may as well overpay for my not so half gallon of ice cream and not pound of M&Ms so that I can afford to drive my car to an expensive gas station to save money there.  OK, I guess it all works!  Oh, yeah, did I tell you that the gas stations offering the discounts are among the most expensive around?  As a matter of fact, as of this morning one of those stations was charging 12 cents per gallon more than the station I’ve been going to for many years.  So, I would have to spend $200 at the grocery store in order to really be getting a discount on my gas.  Hmm, the plot thickens!

Note to self – walk to Dunkin Donuts to pick up a pound of coffee!  While you are there treat yourself to a latte – they claim that price hasn’t gone up in a few years.  The cup appears to be the same size.  Now I have to wonder!

She’s Back!

I was facilitating a workshop today and mentioned that I have a blog.  I smiled and told people that I hadn’t written in several months and that got me to pondering – why not?  What is stopping me?  I loved writing about my peeves and ponderings, so why did I stop?

 I’ve actually given this quite a bit of thought recently.  One reason (or is it just an excuse?) that I stopped writing months ago is that a couple of people I know mentioned that by writing a blog including peeves I was putting negative energy into the universe.  I didn’t necessarily agree at the time.  So, why did that stop me?  It could be that a part of me (or as a dear friend would say – one in me) did believe it.  What if I am putting negative energy into the universe?  Is that really a good reason to stop doing something I was having fun doing?  Why would I let comments from a couple of people stop me?  Oh so many questions and so few answers!

 So, I’ve now decided that I am not going to let what others say stop me.  Hmm – it sure wouldn’t be the first time!  It isn’t just about negative stuff.  This blog is my way of getting my thoughts out.  It is meant to be entertaining.  It is not meant to be about complaints.  It is about my own peeves and ponderings.  At times it will sound like I may be complaining.  I will try to do it in an entertaining way.  And you have to admit that the peeves are cute characters!

 I get daily notes from Seth Godin’s blog.  (http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/)  This week one of his blog entries was:

Just imagine how much you’d get done

…if you stopped actively sabotaging your own work.

We must be talented, powerful and resilient creatures indeed given how much we manage to produce despite the constant undercutting, ridicule and needless censorship we aim at ourselves.

This one hit really close to home!  After all, isn’t that what I’ve been doing on so many levels?  I stopped writing this blog.  I stopped working on my life coaching website.  I wake up during the middle of the night beating myself up for those things and still don’t move forward.  What’s that really about?  Funny thing is that I shared that particular entry with a networking group I facilitate as a way to motivate them to get out of their own way.  Good lesson in there for me too, n’est-ce pas?

I am here this evening to tell you that I’m back!  I don’t know how often I will write, but I will not stop completely.  I’ve decided that I have something to say and I am going to say it and share it.  Why not?  Doing anything different will be sabotaging my own work.  Perhaps I won’t wake up around 4 am listening to my saboteur voices chattering away about the things I coulda, oughta, woulda, shoulda have done.  (Sounds awkward, but that’s the best way I know how to say it and this is my blog so it’s gonna stay that way!)

Stay tuned – I will either be sharing another pet peeve or will be pondering over something soon!  Really.  No, it’s true this time.  

Have a good night (or morning or afternoon or whatever time of day it is for you as you read this entry).

How Convenient! (Or is it really?)

Yesterday as I stood on the platform at the train station I looked around and saw quite a few people checking their Blackberries or other smart phones.  When I got in the train I had to stand so I started looking around at the people standing nearby or sitting in front of me.  I had to smile when I noticed how many people were “playing” on their phones or other such devices.  One woman was doing a crossword puzzle in a newspaper.  That got me to thinking and yes, dare I say, pondering about the good ole days when we didn’t have such conveniences.  Conveniences?  Are they really?

When I think about it, gone are the days that you would sit on the train and read an actual book or newspaper.  Gone are the days when we left the office and weren’t expected to be connected.  Gone are the days when we made phone calls from home or the office.  Now it seems we are a society that has a desire, if not a perceived need, to be connected all the time.  Most of us carry at least a cell phone.  We can be reached no matter where we are whether there is an emergency or not.  There is no escape – not unless you are in an area without cell reception.  And how often do we like that?

I had the same cell phone for 4 years and finally broke down and bought a new one.  Why?  Partly because I wanted the convenience of a qwerty keyboard.  I’ve been texting and the phone keypad was a pain in the butt to use as a keyboard.  While at the store I decided to break down and get a smart phone with access to the internet.  I justified it to myself and my spouse by saying that now that I am in business for myself I need to be able to get emails and such even when I’m not near my laptop.  Really?  Doesn’t that just add to the stress?  How convenient is this modern convenience?  Is there an expectation that I will respond more quickly now that I have the ability?  Will anyone know I have the ability?  (They will now if they’re reading this!)

That started me thinking about ‘modern’ conveniences.  When I started my career in information technology we didn’t have personal computers on everyone’s desk, never mind in everyone’s home.  As I was pondering over the changes I’ve seen in my lifetime I started thinking of the changes my parents had experienced.  Then I began to think of my grandmother who was born in 1912 and died earlier this year at the age of 97.  Imagine the changes she saw in society.  What we take for granted today she probably could never even dream of.  I remember once many years ago she called me and got my answering machine.  (Yes, answering machine, not voice mail.)  She didn’t know what to do and left a message I thought was just so precious.  In her time, there were party lines and no such thing as answering machines.  Either you reached the person you were calling or you called back.  It was that simple. 

Now that got me to thinking about whether or not life was more simple back then too.  We think of technology as conveniences, but are they really?  How many of you in the corporate world dream of a vacation or even a weekend when you don’t have to check your emails or voice mail messages?  How many of you would like to leave the convenience of constantly being ‘connected’ behind and just have fun?  Now don’t get me wrong, I like my modern conveniences just as much as the next person.  I’m just wondering what it would be like to spend some quality time with people and not have anyone check their devices for messages.  Oh yeah, and I am well aware that some of you are reading this from those same devices.  (Thank you!) 

So, think about it next time you are out with friends and you are tempted to check messages from your device.  What if you were to simply enjoy the company and disconnect from the rest of the world for a few hours.  Sounds blissful to me.  I think I’ll sign off for now.

My Pleasure

Do two negatives make a positive?  I’ve always been told that isn’t the case.  Yet so many of us take two words that have negative connotations and turn them into a positive response.  I’m talking about the words ‘no problem’.  Sounds like a positive response when I hear it, but think about it, folks – it really is two negatives we turn into a positive.  It isn’t really a problem to simply say ‘you’re welcome’, and we say it so seldomly.  Well, at least I don’t hear it very often.

I started thinking about this a few days ago while I was walking along a trail in the woods near my cottage.  I encountered quite a few other people out on a beautiful fall day.  Some were on bikes and others were walking or jogging.  One thing I noticed, other than the leaves turning color and how quiet it is to walk on this trail in the fall, is how polite people were when passing in either direction.  If a cyclist was coming up behind me I would hear them say ‘on your left’ as they approached.  As people approached from the opposite direction they would nod or say good morning.  I thought about how different a feel it was to walk along this trail compared to walking on a more crowded sidewalk in town.  (And perhaps I’ll write about that another day.)

After stepping aside for bicyclists a few times I started thinking of my response.  Inevitably they would thank me and I would respond with a ‘no problem’ or ‘certainly’ – something of that nature.  I rarely said ‘you’re welcome’.  I became aware of my response as I passed a woman walking her dog.  I couldn’t help but smile as the dog tried to jump up to greet me.  She thanked me when I smiled and told her how cute the dog was.  This time I said ‘my pleasure’.  Hmm, why not?  It was my pleasure to smile and tell her the dog was cute. 

As I walked I thought about it more and thought about the fact that when I am working with people either in the office or coaching on the phone I very frequently respond to their thanks with the words ‘my pleasure’.  It’s almost as though I’ve been programmed to say it when doing the work I love.  So, why wouldn’t I say my pleasure when getting out of someone’s way?  Or when they thank me for whatever?  If it isn’t my pleasure, then why not say ‘you’re welcome’?  Why respond with a double negative that they will believe is a positive? 

Think about it, folks.  Is it ‘no problem’ or is it your pleasure to have done something eliciting a thank you?  If it isn’t your pleasure, maybe a simple ‘you’re welcome’ will do?  Try it and let me know how it goes for you!

One more thing – it truly was my pleasure to write this post!

Snap, Crackle, Pop

No, I’m not talking about the Rice Krispies cartoon mascots.  I’m talking about gum chewers who snap and pop their gum.  There is something about the snapping of gum that really gets to me.  Hmmm – here’s an opportunity to say it really peeves me.  Quite frankly, I find it rude. Most people chew quietly when eating a meal, why would they snap their gum for everyone around to hear?

Years ago I worked with a woman who was always chewing gum.  No problem there.  I used to chew gum a lot back then too.  What really bothered me was the incessant snapping.  Even when she was asked to stop the snapping, it continued.  She was told by more than one person that it was offensive and still it continued.  We would try to be really nice and polite about asking her to not snap her gum in the office.  She would just laugh and tell us that she had the right to chew gum.  True enough.  What she didn’t have the right to do was to offend the coworkers around her.  And by the way, I sat in an office probably 20 feet from her cubicle and I could still hear it.  A friend of mine sat across from her and I have no idea how they both survived the gum snapping day in and day out.

(Now I’m thinking about a few more things that peeved me in the office – but they’ll wait for other blog entries.)

On the train ride home a few days ago I heard the familiar sound of someone snapping gum.  I shuddered.  Yup, literally shuddered.  I looked around to see if I could identify the offender.  No, it wasn’t her.  I don’t know the young man who was snapping away in oblivion.  I did see another woman look in his direction several times and shake her head.  Aha!  I’m not the only one who can’t stand it.  (But of course I knew that from the experience I had had at work so many years ago.)

So for all you gum chewers out there – go ahead and chew away, but do it quietly please!

Look Both Ways Before Crossing

Today’s peeve is about crosswalks.  I often walk to the train station nearby.  It’s not a difficult walk, really.  The most difficult part of the walk is crossing a main street to the station.  My mother taught me at a very young age to look both ways before crossing the street.  Naturally I still do that since it is still the safest way to cross a street.  There is a crosswalk that is clearly painted on the street and there is no traffic signal at that particular crossing.  Most of the time – and by this I mean at least 90% of the time – I step into the crosswalk and have to contend with speeding vehicles.  I often wait patiently for a break because I do value my life.  And other times I am not as patient because this is a pet peeve of mine! 

There are times that I will gesture (no, not that one) to drivers that I am in a crosswalk.  Sometimes that helps and they will stop to let me cross.  At other times they still ignore me and speed past.  Sometimes one driver will stop, but then someone behind them will take the opportunity to pass them.  What’s up with that?  Naturally I’ll wait until it is safe to cross, but sometimes I am fooled by a driver who doesn’t understand they are obligated to stop.  One morning recently I was at the crosswalk with a friend and we started to step out.  A vehicle stopped and I took another step.  Another car came speeding around the stopped car and my friend and I both jumped back.  Fortunately we were not hit!  And even more fortunately, there was a police officer approaching from the other direction.  He turned the lights on, made a u-turn and stopped the offending vehicle.  It felt like a victory for us. 

Oh, and did I tell you how much this really bugs me when the weather is less than stellar?  Think about it – the drivers are staying dry and warm in their vehicles and I’m standing on a street corner trying to cross to get to work without freezing or getting soaked.  Come on folks, give me a break.   It is the law after all.  (Massachusetts General Law, Chapter 89, Section 11)

Now I’m not saying that drivers need to stop for pedestrians who are trying to run across the street between parked cars or in the middle of the block.  I’m talking about crossing in marked crosswalks.  As both a pedestrian and a driver, I get peeved when I see someone running out into traffic with the expectation that all drivers will see them and that, of course, they are entitled to cross where it is convenient for them rather than in the crosswalk.  Hmmm, sounds like a posting for another day.

Why not YIELD?

While I’m on this transportation theme there’s something else that really, really bugs me.  Why is it that many (dare I say most) drivers don’t understand the meaning of the red and white triangular sign stating YIELD?  Maybe it isn’t so much that drivers don’t understand the meaning of the sign, they may think it means everyone but themselves.

Here's an example of the sign I'm writing about

When I see a YIELD sign I slow down, check for oncoming traffic then drive forward when it is safe.  I’ve noticed that other drivers speed up to cut off oncoming traffic.  I’ve been involved in so many near misses because as the driver on the main road I haven’t felt the need to YIELD to drivers making their way on the road.  After all, I trust that they will actually YIELD.  Silly me!

Once when I was approaching a highway there were a few cars travelling pretty quickly.  I stopped at the YIELD sign because it wasn’t safe to go out into the traffic.  The driver in the vehicle behind me got really upset with me, blared the horn and made some choice hand gestures.  Hey, the rules of the road say that when approaching a YIELD sign a ‘driver must prepare to stop if necessary to let a driver on another approach proceed (but has no need to stop if his way is clear).’  I felt the need to stop so I wouldn’t get hit.  It wasn’t safe to proceed.  Why yell at me for following the rules of the road?

I really get irate about this when there are children in the vehicle.  I’ve come close to hitting vehicles that have cut in front of me and I get very upset about what could have been.  If you want to put your own life in danger, so be it.  Don’t get me involved and do not get children involved!

What’s stopping you from YIELDing?

Driving in the Rain

What is it with drivers who choose not to use their headlights in less than optimum driving conditions? Recently I was driving in a horrendous downpour. I could barely see the car in front of me – and I was in bumper-to-bumper traffic. I started noticing how many vehicles on the opposite side of the highway did not have headlights on. What the heck? If visibility is that low, why wouldn’t you turn on your headlights? I drive an older car – built well before they started making cars with headlights that automatically turn on – so I have to manually turn the headlights on. I turn them on as part of my routine. Start the car, fasten the seat belt, turn on the lights. It’s really that simple.

So, finally traffic breaks open a bit and we all start driving a bit faster – but still well under the speed limit. Now visibility is even worse because the rain is pelting down even harder and the back splash from tires is even greater. I noticed that I could barely see the vehicles around me, never mind the ones in front of me. Again, what’s up with not using headlights? I wanted to change lanes and kept looking to make sure no vehicle was coming up from behind. You know it, I started to change lanes and sure enough, some yahoo comes barrelling up – with no headlights! What’s up with that!

This is something that has bothered me for quite some time. I keep pointing it out to people I’m driving with either in downpours of rain or in snow conditions. Why isn’t there a law in Massachusetts stating that when you need your windshield wipers, you must have your headlights on? Other states have that law. Hmmm, how would it be enforced? After all, there is a law saying you have to clean the snow off your car and we’ve all seen many cars on the roads that haven’t been cleaned. How is that enforced? Maybe that’s a topic for another day!

Safe driving!

Would you like a seat?

Is chivalry dead? Sometimes I wonder. I still have certain expectations about good manners. Like men shouldn’t wear a hat at the dinner table and they should hold a door open – especially for older women. I am old enough to remember all about women’s liberation, but I still like good old fashioned manners. I will always open the door for my mother or my friends. It is something I learned to do at a younger age and now it is just natural. They never seem to be offended by it. My grandmother used to step aside and wait for me to open the door for her. My stepfather would never think of walking through a door that I am holding open. I know to open the door for my mother and then to step aside to let him hold it open for me.

So, last week on the train I was minding my own business by people watching – one of my all time favorite pasttimes. I spotted a woman who I thought might be pregnant. Now I know better than to ask if a woman is pregnant. As people pushed their way on to the train for the morning commute she ended up standing nearer to me and was obviously pregnant. I was seated and offered to get up to give her my seat. At first she just looked down at me and didn’t say anything. She turned to talk to the man standing with her instead. I started to stand and asked her again. She insisted I stay seated. I felt pretty guilty because it seemed like she should be seated instead of me. And I got over it because she was given the choice and chose to remain standing.

I’ve talked with friends about this many times. Why is it that so often a woman will offer her seat to another woman? Now I’m not suggesting that no men do it, it’s just that so often on the train we notice that it is women who offer first. I was on crutches for 6 weeks several years ago. Each day the train conductor went into the car I was about to get in to make sure there was a seat for me. One afternoon I heard him tell 2 men to get up because neither of them would volunteer to give me their seat. A woman right there offered hers and it angered the conductor. Since neither of them would give up his seat for me, they both lost their seats. I felt guilty about that too.

And that brings me to one last thought (for now) on this. Recently a young man held a door open for me and when I turned to thank him he asked me why I seemed so surprised. I told him that it doesn’t often happen. He laughed and told me his mother wouldn’t be happy if she saw him walk through in front of me. We both smiled and moved on.

Hey, it just occurred to me – chivalry is not dead – it just doesn’t necessarily show up where or when we expect it.